Look into my eyes, not around my eyes, look into my eyes, and three-two-one you’re falling fast asleep...
When you wake up you will forget that you have heard of a beautiful, unspoiled, remote campsite on a simple piece of flat machair beside a mile of tidal sands. You will forget that it has no facilities beyond a couple of public WCs and a water tap and that it is, quite simply, lovely. You won’t remember that, when the tide comes in, there’s an expanse of knee-deep water that’s ideal for an idle paddle, or that when the tide goes out there’s a swathe of sand that stretches nearly a mile out to the waves. Neither will it occur to you that you’ve seen a couple of whitewashed crofts and some grazing cows across the bay, nor that behind you are the mountains. You won’t realise that there’s absolutely nothing here to spoil the view.
When you wake up, you will forget that you’ve ever heard of the beauties of the Ardroil Grazings Committee campsite and you will never, ever, go there. Because if you go, you’ll enjoy it and then tell other people about it, and then it won’t be just our little secret anymore. So, when you wake up, you’ll forget everything you’ve just read.
Three-two-one and you’re back in the room. So, you were saying you’re off to Skegness for your holidays this year? How lovely.